Dead dude embedded in my face: FDO™ out 3-4 days
Posted November 12th, 2009 by scottsigler (FD∅™)
in
Junkies, I'm off to the dentist today. After they put me under (which for me takes way more knock-out juice than any normal human, I'm told), they are going to literally saw into my face and embed a piece of dead dude in my upper jaw. That's right, a piece of some deceased cat's skeleton will be wedged in my maw. This will knock me on my ass for a few days.
Hence, all world-crushing activity will come to a halt until my body goes all Borg on this chunk of bone, and starts to assimilate the skeletal framework. My osteoblasts will turn that foreign bone into native bone, and boom-shakalaka, I fill in a hole (that you can see as my right incisor in the picture at left).
If my dental surgery record holds steady, there will be much vomiting. Yay me! But when I return, I will have fully subsumed the soul of another human being. The first of many, bitches, the first of many ...
UPDATE (5:27pm, PT, 11/13/09):
The dead dude is now fully embedded in my face. It was not fun. I kid you not -- twice they had to use a freakin' hammer and a freakin' chisel. A chisel, bitches. Did I mention the chisel?
Dental surgery my ass
Excellent work
In TF10 you said...
__________________________________________
MC; CA; UNdead Jester and Love Slave of the UNdead Grave Mother
The quest is clear
We must find the name of this dead man. For, should the day ever come, and the FDO joins the forces of good and righteousness, writings stories about lost puppies and little kittens in balloon adventures and forsaking stories of genital mutilation, we must know the man’s name, to call upon his soul, and give us the strength to defeat this new, goody two shoes monster from inside his caramely sweet heart.
Until then, I’m calling him “Dave”.
the trick to staying sane is to just out-crazy the world
Could've been worse....
Dental surgey? Yeah, right...
Come on, are we really expected to believe that this was dental surgery? That the FDO goes under the knife just to fix his teeth? Don't insult us, what kind of cybernetic combat mod, secret mind controll doohickey did you get? Are you going to tell us, or do we have to guess?
Anyway, dental surgery or mod-chip upgrade, hope it heals as it should.
Krister
http://flawlessconfusion.blogspot.com
Listen to TITLE FIGHT Round 10 for details ...
ouch
had two teeth removed, one fell a part and he had to pulverize it with hammer and had troubles grabbing it with the pliers (just keep them away from my knuckles) did i say ouch? i feel your pain, FDO.
#
the NEW Chief of SFPD
http://www.pgholyfield.com/ma
20 crack hits
I take the over on 3 acts of vomiting.
the trick to staying sane is to just out-crazy the world
WTF??
That is some fucked up SHIT right there.
must be one bad-ass dentist to take down the FDO
When I was younger, just a bad little kid,
My mama noticed funny things I did,
Like shootin' puppies with a B B gun
I'd poison guppies, and when I was done
I'd find a pussycat and bash in its head
That's when my mama said
What did she say?
She said, "My boy, I think someday
You'll find a way
To make your natural tendencies pay
You'll be a dentist
You have a talent for causin' things pain
Son, be a dentist
People will pay you to be inhumane
No wonder dentists have a high rate of suicide
Its almost like lawyer jokes except the fear is real.
Go Steelers! Go Dawgs!
That just makes me cringe
I bet you were just awake enough to hear all this hammering and crunching? Dentist horror fiction should be an extrememly popular niche. Of course the dentist would always be killed in the MOST unpleasant way possible. I'm sure you can think of a few things to do with a hammer and chisel.
Eeek, now I'm really going to have nightmares.
Go Steelers! Go Dawgs!
Of course you do realize...
that stuff like this - implanting some dead dude's tissues in a living host - is EXACTLY how the Zombie Apocolypse will start, right?
I, for one, welcome our new Zombie Overlords. :)
**Signatures? We don't need no stinkin' signature!**
Hmmm..
I wonder what it would take for the dentist to cut me out a little souvenir?? I wonder what I could get on eBay for it?? Hmmm..
Well, that's one way to take over the world.
Have pieces of your minions surgically implanted into your body!
Cool, but i knew a girl
Cool, but I knew a girl years ago that was born with no cartilage in her ears and got some from cadavers so she didn't look like Chunk from Goonies. None the less, good luck with the vomiting and get better soon!
Festina Lente (Make Haste Slowly)
Dark Knight Marine General
Jayguana
So sign up as a donor
If you're an organ donor one day you could be assimilated by the FDO or some person missing ear cartilage too! (Yes, I have my donor card)
Go Steelers! Go Dawgs!
Ok you win
In the dental horror stories. I only had them slice a chunk out of my palette and slice open my gums to stick a piece of my own flesh in to graft. You got a dead guy!
I have a feeling that there will be a dentist in some upcoming book that dies a horrific death. (Maybe with several sharp implements in his/her mouth while someone asks inane questions or lectures about flossing.)
Good luck and I hope you start feeling better very soon. Or at least have enough good painkillers not to care.
Go Steelers! Go Dawgs!
Oddly...
That's pretty frickin' cool! Now if only you could absorb a soul so you could join the rest of the human race.
hhhmmm... SynapticJam on Toast - hhhmmm... tastes like chicken (aka PUVJK) #4 in crack hits (Special? Ain't I just) Multiple S.H.I.T. Award Recipient! Double Dipper and Triple Threat! All-around uberjunkie!
sorry bout that...
I must be a bit punchy this morning. Think it comes from being behind in my word count. ....
hhhmmm... SynapticJam on Toast - hhhmmm... tastes like chicken (aka PUVJK) #4 in crack hits (Special? Ain't I just) Multiple S.H.I.T. Award Recipient! Double Dipper and Triple Threat! All-around uberjunkie!
If I had a soul, I'd be offended ...
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